The walls come falling down.

Posted: June 27, 2009 in General

Friday Jr, and I went and saw Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Although I’ve decided that putting movie reviews up on my blog really doesn’t serve a purpose, this is a movie wort talking about. First, though, I have to say that I like Michael Bay, almost without fail his movies are some of my favorite “popcorn” flicks ever produced. Bad Boys, The Rock, Armageddon, and the first Transformers movie are some of my favorite guilty pleasure movies.

That said, Transformers: ROTF is a train wreck. It’s so much of a train wreck that I don’t even know where to start with its problems. With a run-time of almost 2 1/2 hours it’s an exhausting ride.

Problem 1: The Script
I don’t think anyone has high expectations for the plot and script of a transformers movie, but this script is ridiculous. Sure the plot is flawed, but a decent script could have made it work, however instead the script makes a flawed plot so much worse. This feels like someone hacked together three different scripts and didn’t really proofread the end product. When it’s over, there are dozens of “what the fuck” moments (so many that I don’t want to wast the time and energy actually composing a list of the moments).

Problem 2: Jar Jar Binks
If we’ve learned anything from George Lucas it’s that wrapping a stereotype up in a costume still makes it a stereotype (not to mention insulting and rarely all that funny). For ROTF it’s the twins, “Mud Flap” and “Skids”. These characters are supposed to be comic relief, but they are annoying and never once actually add anything to the story. Without them, the movie still would have been lackluster, but at least it wouldn’t be embarrassing.

Problem 3: Quantity not Quality
One report puts the number of robots in ROTF at 60. I don’t remember how many were in the first movie, but I’m going to guess there were 10-15. At 60 you can’t keep track of who is who, it’s a little too much of a good thing. After a while it’s like it’s just an endless line of robots, and we don’t really care about a single one of them.

All said, there are two things that I really liked about the new movie. First, the fight scenes are much better than in the first. A lot less “shaky cam”, and a lot more slow mo. This is the kind of stuff that we want to see in a Transformers movie.

Second, bonus to Bay for making Soundwave a satellite orbiting Earth. Extra bonus for the satellite launching a cat-like robot to Earth. Obviously Soundwave as a Walkman wouldn’t work in this movie, and a communications satellite is a reasonable take on the concept.

In the end, I have come to the realization that Bay can’t do sequels. Bad Boys is far superior to the sequel, and Transformers is far superior to its sequel. Of course the box office results are going to be quite good, which means that I’m sure we’ll see a third movie. If Bay does it, hopefully he spends a bit more time on some of the plot/story details.

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